Wednesday, 6 March 2013


So I've found it....that elusive resource that will keep our world light when the coal mines run out of coal and the nuclear people run out of space to put their glow-ey nuclear mess. It's not wind (though I do think those wind turbines are beautiful and majestic) and it's not solar (YeY, send all the rays to ME, a tan would be grEAt right now) is NUTELLA.

Nonooooo...not Nutella Nutellaaaa. But the original gianduja paste thingumyjig that is reeeeaally made of nuts and is tarditional in Italy and therefor by default a classy thing to make and eat and you must absolutely NOT feel guilt towards.

So let's breakdown it's brilliance.

No. 1. see above.

No. 2. it is made of nuts, soso many nuts. I've done the calculations and it is 53% hazelnuts. None of this "15g contains 2 whole hazelnuts" malarky, 15 grams of this miracle potion will be over half hazelnuts and get this...nuts are BRILLIANT for you. They give you shiny hair and bendy joints and a speedy brain and a generally lovely spring in your step. It's HEALTHY.


Ok sorrysorry, I'm getting carried away. But this possibly is just one of the most exciting days that has ever been...I mean, I solved the energy crisis! Healthy, clean and sustainable fuel for us all, it's the new black gold....and did I mention it tastes like Nutella. I'm off for a lie dawn...all this excitement....With Love and Cake.

Homemade Nutella.
Adapted from a Smitten Kitchen recipe

A few notes:
  • I'm afraid this is not the sort of recipe that I can say 'don't worry if you don't have a food processor' amount of chopping is going to get you the desired effect here...whizzy blades are a must.
  • In theory you could use any nut to make this...and I assure you that I will and will fill you in with all the deets. 
  • This will keep well for over a week in the which case it will get quite firm, so if you want it a bit runnier, let it get to room temperature before you use it.
Make 1 large jar
You will need

300g hazelnuts
65g cocoa powder
155g icing sugar
3 tsp flavourless oil (veg, sunflower etc)
pinch salt

  • Preheat the oven to 180°c.
  • Spread the nuts out on a baking sheet and toast in the oven for 10 minutes until bronzed and smelling divine.
  • Now we need to remove the skins...this isn't difficult, just a teensy bit messy. All you do is put the toasted nuts in the middle of a clean tea towel and fold up the tea towel around the nuts.
  • Rubrubrub the nuts with between the layers of tea towel and you will find that the majority of the skins easily flake off; you don't need to be overly fastidious, just make sure most of the loose skin is freed.
  • Pick the skinless hazelnuts out and pop them in your food processor.
  • Discard the skins...I just flapped the tea towel around outside and left them for the birds.
  • Now for the miraculous bit....process the nuts for about 5 minutes; first they will get chopped up, then you will have a grainy paste, and eventually they will 'liquify', which is when some oil is separated and you have something that looks more like a nut butter or a smooooooth paste.
  • Add the cocoa, icing sugar and 2 tbsp of the oil and process for another minute or so.
  • If you want the mixture to be a bit looser add the rest of the oil and whizz again...otherwise your ready for Nutella in a jar, or ready yourself with a spoon.

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